Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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