But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
