Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Send help, water and tortillas.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Randomize
