Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Randomize