There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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