Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Let's get the cat blown out
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
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