pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
