is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Randomize
