Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
