"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
