More tranny stories later!
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
