and my herpes radar will keep us safe
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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