You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
