Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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