i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
