Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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