you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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