Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
