You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
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