all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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