dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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