I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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