Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
