Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
