Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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