is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
