just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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