i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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