May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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