just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
