when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
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