that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Randomize
