I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
