Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
