YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
