He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
