kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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