dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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