Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
