So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
