have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize
