I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
