I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
