Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize