its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
