I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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