remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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