summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Randomize