Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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