Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
worst night to have a conscience
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
We don't watch enough power rangers
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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