Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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