Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Randomize
